Weekend Activity: Build A Campfire
The nights have been great for warming up by a nice toasty campfire. This weekend, plan to spend a few hours with your sweetie around a campfire or firepit.
Here’s what you do:
1) Tell your favorite scary campfire story.
I remember when I was a kid there was this book…
…and, although I was scared out of my mind, I had a awesome time reading these stories around the campfire with my friends. Just because we are adults doesn’t mean that we have to give up our child-like wonder and excitement over little things such as ghost stories. Although, I do have to say, the stories in this book will not cut it for adults. So you will need to come up with an extra scary version for this activity.
2) Tell a story of when you were scared in your current relationship*.
Ok… I know… this one may not be as fun, but it will do wonders for your relationship. Opening up and being vulnerable about fears, insecurities, or worries that exist in your relationship brings them into awareness. With this awareness they can be addressed, and then overcome.
Here are some examples:
“When I was in the military I was worried that my deployment would break us apart. I wasn’t sure that you would be there when I came back.”
“I worry when you are gone away on business that you will be tempted to stray.”
“When I discovered from a mutual friend that you cheated in a past relationship, I was worried it would happen in our relationship. To be honest, I still have that worry.”
“I’m scared that we will grow apart.”
“When I was diagnosed with a mental illness early within our relationship, I was afraid that you would leave me.”
“I’m scared that you are becoming bored with me.”
“When we found out that I couldn’t have children, I thought you would divorce me because I knew how much you wanted them.”
3) Ease the fears.
After you have heard each other’s relationship fears, find ways to support each other and ease these fears. Start by letting your partner know what you need from them and go from there. Work as a team to come up with a game plan to let these fears know that they have no place in your relationship.
4) Enjoy some smores!
Need more inspiration?
*A word of warning: this part of the activity is neither appropriate nor safe for those relationships in which violence is used for control or intimidation. The reference to being “scared” is not about being threatened; it’s more about insecurities or worries that are present within the relationship.
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